2 Stroke Penalty

I've been thinking about this Tiger Woods situation. I never figured I'd see his life in the public eye like this. But really, I've never thought about Tiger Woods, for any reason. So, I'd say that's a sufficient explanation. Looking at his background and the mentality I presume he has about himself, it's not really surprising to me that he cheated on his wife now. But I don't see that as the story. Men cheat all the time. The angle I'm looking at is what exactly the motives are of these women who sleep with famous married men. I find that very interesting and troubling.

I know you're saying "Hey, why are you singling out the girls, you chauvinistic ne'er do well!?". Well, person that can't let me get into making a point, when's the last time you heard of some random schmuck off the street sneaking around having hot, drugged up sex with Halle Berry? You can say celebrity women just don't cheat as much and that could be very true. However, with the knowledge I have of the male brain, I'd say it could be happening everyday. If Halle Berry had an affair with a guy, he'd just be happy to be having an affair with Halle Berry. Telling people would be stupid. It could fuck up your having sex with Halle Berry plans. I wouldn't tell anyone, personally. ("Anthony, why would Halle Berry have an affair with you?". That's a question I get a lot, in my everyday life. I don't know. But Tiger was married to a Swedish supermodel and cheated with some weird looking bitch who was on the show Tool Academy, so there's some kind of precedent here, I think.) The most a guy would use the situation for is to be able to hold it over his best friends' heads forever. That's accomplishment, to a dude. Your friend gets on your case about something like "Man, you totally pussied out last night" and you're like "Yeah, maybe, but I also remember that time I pussied out Halle Berry." That doesn't even really make any sense, it's a real grammatically abstract thing to say, but he'll understand....and he'll be pissed....cause you just won. Having trump cards to play is important to guys. We enjoy the little things.

These women seem to be up to something more sinister. It's like they hope he gets caught. They want the recognition of it, from people they don't know. They want to be a ho celebrity. Tiger admits he's had transgressions and, all of a sudden, like 3 girls come out like "Hey, I had sex with him. Look over here. I'd love to damage his reputation, for some tv exposure.". From my estimation, all these girls look like the kind of girls who growing up they were told they were princesses and they were special but now they're 26 and don't fit the bill. They haven't done anything, have no skills, people don't take them seriously cause they have this fucked up perception of themselves, so....they go out and do something to get some acknowledgement. They figure "Tiger Woods could treat me like a princess.". But then Tiger Woods treats her like a prostitute, like the pimp he is(Tiger Woods is an immaculate pimp name if I've ever heard one), and then she decides to use him to make herself famous so she can make a bunch of money and finally get her jewel encrusted tiara. (By the way, I didn't even think this theory through beforehand at all but it's making so much sense to me right now.)

What I'm saying is that it's really bad parenting. It's bad parenting on both ends. I'm not letting Tiger off the hook either. We caught him by the toe and we're not gonna let him go. He cheated a bunch of times and that's douchey, any way you slice it. But growing up, he probably did nothing but golf, he was pushed in that direction, and he never learned how to be a human being....just a golfing machine. If people took the job of parenting more seriously and taught their children to have good, personal beliefs and the ability to respect themselves and others, there would be less of this. Don't fill your daughter's head with thoughts of being a princess either...unless she is, of course....real princesses usually turn out to be pretty nice people actually. So, teach your children to be good. If you don't have children but you know someone with children, teach their children. If you don't know anyone with children, steal one from someone who looks like a fuckhead. We don't want them growing up and filling a poor Swedish supermodel with sadness.

P.S. Another lesson I find in this story is that arrogance never pays. This motherfucker leaves a message on a girl's phone like "Hey, this is Tiger. My wife is suspicious. Take your name off your voicemail.". No, cause that could never come back to haunt you. It was probably one of the million other guys named after a jungle cat. You should've left your address and social security number too. Fucking asshole.