Things I Learned From The Movies (First Edition)

This is exactly what it sounds like. I haven't made a list in quite a while. So, here's a list. Some of the best advice/info I ever got.


Things I Learned From The Movies



1. Never know too much about nefarious activites. You'll probably end up dead.

2. Sometimes, you're too old for this shit.

3. If someone does you wrong, don't yell at them. Do something crazy like kiss them. It'll scare them a lot more.

4. When you're kung fu fighting people in an open area, it's inevitable that doves will show up. Embrace it.

5. Love always works out, in the end.

6. Love never works out, in the end.

7. French people are weird.

8. Doing a shitload of cocaine has never been good for anyone.

9. It is a wonderful life.

10. Hitmen are great at babysitting.

11. I learned all about shrimp. Shrimp is the fruit of the sea.

12. In space, the other people who are being murdered by aliens can often hear you scream. But no one else.

13. The Holocaust was shitty.

14. Jewish people don't bowl on saturday.


15. If you run on the beach, in short shorts and tight tank tops, with your good black friend and then embrace him, in the water, you will become a better boxer.


16. If you're a cop but you don't have a buddy, it won't be fun at all.


17. Racism is shitty.


18. It's perfectly normal to burst into song, at any time.


19. People love twists. You should trick everyone you know, for a long time.


20. You can kill a pimp and get away with it.


21. War is dumb. Nothing ever happens...unless it does...and then you probably get shot in the face.


22. Always die hard. If you die easy, there's no point in living free.


23. If someone wants to take you to a creepy, deserted place, you probably shouldn't go.

24. The best weapon against hillbilly rapists is a samurai sword.

25. The janitor, at a college, is probably smarter than all the students there.